sorrow, anxiety, overwhelming dread, sadness, despair, hopelessness, depression, pain, and anger. The list goes on. I was recently watching one of my favorite shows and it was talking about all these emotions. The best part came when the question was asked,"Why are they (people) so happy when they are about to be so sad? And the answer is, because they're about to be so sad." I was confused at first and thought the character misspoke. Then it dawned on me, he's right.
I don't have to tell you about life. We all already know it's hard. I mean, drag you face down through the dirt, hard! We want to be kind to others, but safe. Giving, but able to care for ourselves as well. Supportive, but not enabling. Then there are times when we just don't understand how life could bring us anymore pain and we survive one more day. It would be great to have all the answers, but we don't. But I believe we have enough to get us through life and live happily! My solution is to COLLECT YOUR HAPPY!
Remember when I was talking about the show I watched? Well that simple question made me want to know how to be prepared for the emotional disasters in life. There is no bank where we can deposit our happy emotions. I know that! But for every dark cloud we've had there also had to be a ray of light to come along to push the dark away. In a more practical way of thinking about this, there can be no light if we don't know dark. This is so true. How do we know what happy or sad is without the other? If life was always easy and simple then how would any experience feel any better than the other? Getting a car would feel the same as having a new baby. How is one experience in life any happier than the other when we have nothing to compare it to? Would we care enough to do anything? As parents we want our kids to appreciate having to earn money. To understand and value it. But when we are simply given everything, what do we have to be grateful for? We don't know what bad is in order to say something is good.
So for me an example of collecting my happy, would be remembering my times of real joy! I've lost family that, at times, consumes me with sorrow because I miss them. But then if I think about why I miss them, those memories are happy. I dipped into my happy. One more example I've seen of this is in one of my favorite movies...X-Men First Class! There is a scene where a young professor X is trying to help a young Magneto with his powers. Magneto needs to be able to move an object larger than he's ever moved before. He's been taught that anger is the best way to strengthen his powers. To his surprise he is asked to remember his happiest memory. The memory he found was of a time when he was a child on his birthday. His mother was there and he was at complete peace and happiness. At that moment he was able to move the massive piece of metal. Professor X said he believes true power comes from somewhere between joy and rage. We don't let the rage control us, but at the same time peace isn't always present in our lives.
I hope at this Holiday Season that we are all able to make and collect some happy of our own. The past is a memory we can hold onto. The future is something to look forward to. But today is what we decide to make it. Try to make it something you can add to your collection of happy.
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